I'm not sure if it's a sign of my general health, or just TC related stress, but I'm finding I'm really tired after a day at work. Sure, I'm trying to do some catch-up, but honestly I get home and pretty much crash by 8:30 on work nights.
Which is why I "treasure" my weekends as a chance to recharge the system. That is providing Jake is willing. For the second weekend in a row, there have been blood issues that have thrown me.
Backing up a bit. The strapping applied Thursday has withstood the test of water and I decided to remove it this morning as it was starting to lift anyway. Only downside has been that the way it was strapped meant I couldn't stand fully upright - I was forced into a little bit of a stoop that got annoying after a while. Anyway, with the strapping in place, some of the routine maintenance I'm supposed to do on Jake also became more challenging. He is meant to have a full spin daily to ensure the body doesn't acknowledge the foreign substance and close around it. This has been two half spins over the last few days as it would have been impossible to "free" him to achieve this. Also, flushing was a bit of a mission because the clamp was well and truly taped as well.
On the plus side, cleaning has been easier without the pressure at the bottom of the stoma and the niggling twinges went away as well.
So, back to the blood. Saturday afternoon cleaning was no problem and there was nothing adverse. The weepage even looked to be less than normal. Bed time clean was a whole other matter. Thanks to the rugby tests, I ended up going to bed quite late and when I exposed Jake to the light, there was a fair bit of blood sitting around the flange. Last week's problem was nowhere the amount of last night. As I went through the cleaning process, I remembered I'd knocked Jake in the early evening - one of those situations where temporary amnesia set in and I forgot he was there (damn that strapping must have been good). Anyway, decided not to panic and would see how things looked this morning.
Admit to getting up, having breakfast, watching some world cup - doing virtually anything rather than check Jake out. With no excuses left, the time came and thankfully things seem to have settled down again. While there was a small amount of blood intermingled with the normal weepage, it certainly wasn't enough to worry about. Will take another look at afternoon clean, but hopefully the knock was to blame.
I'll not lie, I'm getting really frustrated about the limitations I'm enduring because of TC (not Jake's fault, he is just along for the ride too). Know it's only for another eight weeks, but this feeling of helplessness isn't sitting well with me.
And what about the support for Jake now the strapping is off? Glad you asked. I now have yet another area of my stomach shaved to try and replicate the angles achieved by the strapping. The pad is in place, but not currently in use. You see, having removed the strapping, it loosened the pad and 1/2 of my shower was conducted with me holding Jake because the damn pad pulled right off. Timing was terrible as usual. When I got out of the shower, I ended up holding Jake straight up and it occurred to me that maybe putting a pad straight up instead of to the side might actually achieve what was needed.
End result, I have 2 pads to choose from now and will assess preferred option tomorrow morning.
Before I forget, watched the "Looking After Yourself During Chemotherapy" DVD with Ruth on Friday night - all 25 minutes of it - and quickly discovered it was an Australian production - gotta love the Aussie twang. Only bit that really shocked me was how young some of the people were who had been through chemo - and the length of some of the treatments (5 months in one case and seemed to be very regular). Seems I might be getting off pretty lightly with only 3 treatments (cycles as they are called) over the 7 weeks.
Apart from that, there wasn't really anything in the film that hadn't already been discussed with me at one stage or another. Really just wanted to see it before Wendie comes on Thursday in case it raised any questions that I wanted answers for. Even read the cancer society booklets on chemo, radiation treatment and cancers of the mouth,nose and throat. Again, no real surprises and a fair bit of repetition.
Seems the common thread is tell the medical staff of any issues and let them adjust medication as required to sort it out. Already a paid-up member of that approach.
The countdown is really starting to commence now - this time next week my first treatment will be less than 24 hours away. How I handle that "pressure" will no doubt be affected by how much I can distract myself with work this week and the whanau on the weekend. Have to keep busy this week as I have a feeling I'll work myself into a state otherwise.
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